Sleepy

Today if I was one of the Seven Dwarfs I would totally be Sleepy. I feel like I could curl up just about anywhere and crash out. I keep thinking I must be coming up on a break here soon... but I've only been at work a half an hour!!! I don't have any phone calls to answer, I have not a single letter to send, nor do I have any outstanding projects hanging over my head and so my tiredness is compounded by boredom...
I just heard my name uttered aloud by a coworker... maybe she has something she wants me to do... but wait... no... no she's walking away, down the hall. Away from my desk...into the dark busyness of her own office...
*moments later*
Oooo look the message light is blinking, something to do... it says that I have two new VM messages, but the phone hasn't rung... someone must be forwarding messages from their phone to mine...
*checking messages*
they weren't really for me -sigh- they're for my co-worker ... at least I will have something to do when I walk them across the hall...
Time to go back to sleep I guess...

my life

yikes,
I'm back in my life, and am 1 for 2 on good days! yesterday I got up and was busy, and worked, and got stuff done, and went to bed before midnight, and overall was pretty successful... today I overslept, and didn't get to work until much later, and am leaving early (ish) for a bridal shower, and am still tired and dragging and unmotivated to get the work done. Sheesh I thought it would take at least a week for me to become this pathetic... sadly it only took about 24 hours... I guess all I have though is this moment right here to stop piddling, and get some work done, to become motivated, and start accomplishing, but I wanted you to know that as of this moment right now I feel like a failure... not a monumental failure, but at least a little failure... (i think that may be an oxymoron-'little failure')
oh well, done with the pep talk and moving on...

This day

Good summer so far, made up of more than thirty 'todays' that have each in their own way been a blessing...
this is the day the Lord has made so I will rejoice and be glad in it... as hard and crazy and wierd as this day is. It's my first day back at the office, I've been gone a month and really I missed the people... just not all the drama, and wierd stuff that always seems to be going on.

contemplations

I got my first speeding ticket this week, and justice has a whole new meaning for me in the sense that for the first time in my life I think I have received it. Always before I have been the recipient of mercy, and grace. I think I have a more full understanding of receiving the just consequence for my actions now than I ever have. And I am better for the justice I have received because I am more grateful for the daily GRACE that I live in.
Who would have thought...

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Today

today my hair has blonde highlights in it... my sister in law Zoe put them there... I think it looks like summer... tell me what you think...
:o)

Busyness

everybody seems to be going in different directions this week. Jake has been able to get some odd jobs the last few days, so he's been pretty busy with that... Cheli is working (as usual, and is pretty busy there)... Yogi keeps getting requests for picnic tables and beds so he's trying to figure out how to do that stuff quickly, and then there's me. I'm gonna go and mow Gram's lawn today, and then she and I are going to do something...
My brother is coming back from Africa tomorrow, which I think means that at this point he has already gotten to the airport, if not taken off...
Seems like everybody is like a bunch of busy ants, so I need to get off the computer and join the crowd I guess...

Make your busyness count though, don't be aimlessly busy like Martha keep your heart focused on the Lord even in your work...

Life and Death

I've been thinking a lot lately about life and death. While I don't believe that God wants to do us harm I am convinced that He has numbered our days. He has given us so many days to live and then comes our death. How we die is dependent on our decisions while we live, but when we die is up to God.
I struggle because this means that God has only given some a few days to live and others he has given years. I know that there are passages of Scripture concerning this issue, but at the moment I am only speaking out of my own thoughts, and ideas. If the number of our days is predetermined it also means that we can not add years to our lives by our lifestyle choices, but that we merely improve the quality of the life we have to live. It also means that we can not take years away, at least not literally but our decisions can chisel away years of productivity, and the 'abundant life' that God designed for us to live.
Morbid thoughts I know but I am being challenged to reevaluate my day to day decisions because of this. I face eternity and must be prepared for it at any moment. I must be prepared for the fact that eternity means more than just my destination but the kind of welcome I will receive is a part of my eternal destiny too.

The Tree

They're chopping down a beautiful tree next door. It's old and the branches twist, and turn in a wonderful way. Like you might expect in an old fairy tale. No one took pictures or anything they just showed up with a cherry picker, a chopper, and some men with chain saws, and started taking the thing down. It's hard for me when things are done unceremoniously, it feels like things are taken for granted and unrecognized. I like that kind of world, where people and things are appreciated. Where giant old trees are noticed for the beauty they provide, and the history they've been part of.
*sigh*

Allegheny

I love it here.

I'm tired and busy, but happy and content. Sometimes I wish that we could combine all of the people here that we love and all of the people there, it's so hard when your heart is spread out all over the country, and world. I want all my friends back home to know and love these people here. To be friends with them, and really bond with them. And vice versa. Instead I have the blessing, and challenge of being a real and deep part of both worlds. The people here will tell you that they belong here because they really feel it, deep down they know it to be true. And sometimes I catch the back end of that feeling too. Sure, I miss the conveniences of the hustling city, but the peace that comes from just being here and the experience of knowing half of the people you drive past is pretty amazing too. Yeah, I miss my family and 'my world' but this is a good exchange because I could really believe that these people are my family too. It's good here, I can see why God said that 'it was good' when He finished creation. And this is the marred and sinful world I gaze at, imagine if this place were unscarred by sin! I really love it here.

Simple Pleasures

Life is full of Simple things and these are some of my faves...

• hot dogs on the grill
• sunshine through the leaves
• soft blankets
• trust
• real people
• dark chocolate
• warm strong arms around me
• water

life is good, not always easy or fun but good...